It’s no secret that Jennifer Lopez’s buttocks have been dethroned as the reigning awe-inspiring celebrity arse. Kim Kardashian’s posterior has left J-Lo’s cheeks in the budonkadust. Miss Kardashian suffered an embarrassment recently (no, not that one) when her custom-prepared Surinam cockroach brooch broke escaped from its chain and headed straight for browner pastures. Remarked Kim, “When you have an ass as fantastically phat as mine, you have to be prepared for the inevitable - creatures moving into it.” So the backside tenant was part of the Kardashian master plan then. Fascinating. Although we’re not entirely certain if she’s referring to the roach or “rapper” Ray-J. In which case a more accurate description would be “moving in and out“. In and out. In and out.